Perenungan di sore hari..

Sebenernya aku bingung harus ngapain skarang.. Pengen banget bisa ngobrol tapi sekarang lg ga ada orang yang bisa diajak ngobrol. Huff.. Kali ini pikiranku sedang berkelana membayangkan apa yang akan terjadi di BDP nanti. I'm still waiting, not starting yet. Apalagi selama pendidikan 1tahun pertama. Hmm.. I pray for God will give me stragth to face it. Give me courage to face all The Giants that will come in my way. Help me God. Berserah mungkin adalah obat mujarab skarang, sambil mempersiapkan hati untuk menyambut esok datang. I believe that You've give me this chance, You've started something new in my live so that I believe You will help me to go trough this all. I do surrander God. I really do.

Masih bertanya-tanya..

Kenapa yah, orang menyampaikan harapanya malah dibilang "ngeluh"? kenapa begitu??? I'm not agree. I want to argue but sudahlah! Gak ada gunanya. I hate this, really. I hate this feeling, when I feel I couldn't express free. Give back my freedom of expression. GIVE IT BACK TO ME! PLEASE! I beg you!

Dag.. Dig.. Dug..

Huumm.. I'm feeling chaos in my mind and my heart. What a weird ambience. Maybe because today I've signed contract with other company without firstly resign from my old office. So, officialy, My status is still employee in my old company. Actually, I will begin in new company on March, so thank God, I still have time following resign procedure which is I could resign from the company 1 month after give my resign application to HR Department.
I've made my Resignation Letter, but I don't hand it yet to HR. Hopefully, I can do that as soon as possible.
Help me God so that all of it will run smoothly.

My own Quote of the day:
" Hope I've made a right decision. Because I know that what I take today will influence my life ahead."

Confuse again..

Actually, I'm not in a mood right now. I thought about what I'm going to do next related to my job, and about manda, He acts so waired today. What happen with him? If He has a problem with his job, or anything which is not related to our relation, why he doesn't want to talk to me? Okay, maybe it's privacy. And If it is about our relation? Why he keeps him self in silent mode? I don't even know what is the answer. I asked him if he was oke, he said that he was. Then, I asked again, the answer was still the same. I decide to stop asking the same question. I just hope he really okay. Whatever his problem is, God, Please take care of him.

hey gal, what are you looking for?

Today at office, while i'm busy with my work. I thought about a friend. We are friend since she came here in Jakarta. I heard a story about her today that makes my heart cries. She did something that I thought she not supposed to do. I'm wondering, what is she looking for? She is searching for an expatriate, but what for? recognition? or what? I still hope and pray for she can take care of her self and keep away from a dangerous things. God, help her. She needs you alot. If she lost her self acceptance, please let her find it in You.
I hope she will think twice to do something that will harm her life, remember her mom and dad that live far away from her and think about her own future. Most of all, she will remember You as her God and Saviour. Her life is too expensive to be lived unworthy. Help her God. Please.

Pusiiiinnnnggg...

I'm puzzled by my report. I can't handle it anymore. I feel frustration with it. God, help me how to face this. I really want to go out from here. I don't know if i have courage to ask. What should I do, dear God? I need Your help. I need Your hand to guide me, where to go. Do not leave me alone like this. Help me.